Back in April I started thinking about doing something incredibly courageous. I started playing around with the idea of going gray. You might be thinking, ” What’s so courageous about that?”
The first time my hair was colored, I was twenty years old. A college roommate put that funky plastic cap over my head and pulled little chunks of hair out with a tool that looked like a tiny crochet needle, to be bleached, resulting in streaks of frosted bleach-blonde hair dispersed throughout my brown locks. I was hooked. From there on out I would beg borrow and plead to get someone to please help hook my hair. Eventually I gave up and just used a straight box of color to lighten what I felt was dull, ugly boring hair. About ten years ago when a friend was learning the art of hair design, she cut and colored my hair beautifully for very little cost and she’s been my hairstylist ever since.
So what’s so scary about going gray? For twenty eight years I have been hiding my true hair color, which was never good enough and now… Maybe being gray will make me old.
To be completely honest (am I ever anything else?), I like it when people learn that I have a 23 and 20 year old and say, “You don’t look like you could possibly be old enough for that!” (Of course I’m not… I had them when I was 12). I’m not sure if I really want to look the part.
For years (probably around 24), I avoided looking in mirrors and being in pictures. Now I can honestly say that I am okay with myself. I don’t want that to change. I don’t want to look in the mirror and see an old lady.
Why is it that when men go gray it makes them dignified, but women go gray and they are old? There’s something wrong with that.
Something VERY wrong.
My husband and I have been reading a book together and in yesterday’s reading the author calls women “The Crown of Creation.” (The icing on the cake, the showpiece, the pièce de résistance). For some reason my mind wouldn’t let go of this idea and how it could relate to my “crown” of soon to be very gray hair. So I decided to look to God’s Word for some wisdom.
“Gray hair is a crown of glory; it is gained by living a godly life.” Proverbs 16:31 NLT
I can choose to look at my gray hair as a curse that makes me old OR I can choose to embrace it and be reminded of everything I have been through and the faith I have held onto throughout all of it.
I am courageous.
I am full of faith.
I am a godly woman, ready to embrace her crown of glory… I think 🙂
I am grateful.
Photo credit: trendseve.com